Lesson Plan Day 28 Tuesday

1. Complete OR of Essay 2
2. Where we are now
1. Two of Four Essays in.
2. Six weeks in, four to go.
3. A fair degree of certainty what class you should take next quarter once these essays are graded. Still possible to go up or down a grade.
4. Several students did not turn in their essays yesterday. More than the first round. They will have to turn that paper in at the end of the quarter. I’m not going to read them until that time. Try the writing center. You can still make 75, but you just made it a lot harder. This is one of the ways students don’t make it. They let things slide. You can still go up. You can still go down.

3. Round Three
1. Love and Death

i. Reading schedule from ITMFWG

1. “Love” to end of chapter (263-276) by Wed

2. “Death” from Ashes to High Street (279-296) by Thursday

3. Death to end of chapter by Friday

a. Quiz over Death and Run-ons/ Fragments on Friday in lab.

4. Sentence Fluency and Conventions
1. OH highlights
2. Full packet tomorrow
3. This is why you are in English 70. Your scores may be lower here than other traits unless you really do the work of editing.
4. If you get good at it, it’s one of the most rewarding parts of writing. Some writers prefer editing to the rough draft. Pros often say the rough draft is what feels like drudgery. The real challenge, the better you get, is in the editing.

5. Topics?
6. Due Dates? Rough Draft 11/9? Final 11/16?
7. Essays returned

Monday HW,
Read first half of Love Stories.
OR of Essay 2 in class.

Lesson Plan Day 27, Friday Lab

1. Quiz on Quotation Marks
2. MS Word thesaurus tool (what’s another word for thesaurus?)
1. Right click on the word.
   
2. Synonyms
   
3. Thesaurus.com
4. Draft 2 (final draft) due Monday, BOP, two copies.
5. Essay Format here.
6. For Fun

Strangers/Family Peer Review Worksheet

1. What do you like best about this paper? What words, phrases, sentences, or paragraphs really stand out for you?

2. In what ways has the writer shown you this person/photograph? Physical description? Short stories? Dialogue?

3. What is still hard to picture about this person/photograph?

4. How is or was this person/photograph important to the writer? Where does the writer show this, or how can this writer do more to show this?

5. List the 3 best verbs (words that show action—sprinted, gulped, glanced).

6. List the 3 best nouns, adjectives (describe nouns) or adverbs (describes verbs, look for -ly words)

7. List three verbs that could be use some zip. (said—could be accused, whispered)

8. list three nouns that could be more specific. (Car—could be rusty Celica, new H3)

9. How would you describe the personality of this paper? (funny, happy, smart-assed, serious, wise etc)

10. What risks did the writer take? Use the broad definition of risk: Did they try to make you laugh, did they reveal something about themselves, did they offer a controversial view, did they reach for a big idea?

Lesson Plan Day 25, Wednesday

1. Quiz on Quotation marks, Friday in Lab
2. Essays due Monday. Bring 2 copies.
1. O/R different scoring explained (+.5 if read)
2. Because of the nature of the assignment I’d like to say this:

i. If you indicate a plan to hurt someone else.

ii. If someone is hurting you.

iii. If you are going to hurt yourself

iv. I’ll talk to you individually. Usually, it’s not what it seems. Sometimes it is. Both are ok.

v. If you become concerned as a peer editor, come talk to me.

3. Peer Editing Handout
1. Groups of 3-4
2. 830

i. Andrew, Lisa, Bianca, Leticia

ii. Yesenia, Leiah, Jay, Alex

iii. Patty, Adrian, Jonas, Freddy

iv. James, Lidia, Mia, Jared

v. Namrata, Jonathan, Melissa, Erika

3. 930

i. Chris S, Jessica, Linwood

ii. Gabriel, Danielle, Francis, Rebecca

iii. Ricardo, Kara, Juan F.

iv. Celina, Tiffany, Phil, Chris B

v. Roberto, Cesar, Stephanie

4. 1030

i. Keri, Nadia, Jonathon, Alva

ii. Daisy, Leticia, Lynn

iii. Josh, Erica, Talea, Meredith

iv. Abbey, Ashley, Chris, Maria

v. Darrel, Cassie, Destiny

Homework: Complete the forms for the other essays. I’ll check for them at the beginning of the period. Tomorrow, back in same groups to read aloud essays and go over comments. NOT to complete the forms. For this to work, you’ve got to get it done tonight.

That gives us time on Friday to ask me questions and type on the computers.

Lesson Plan Day 22 Friday, LAB

HALF WAY THROUGH

1. Freewrite, 10 minutes, Family Photo
2. Collect/Check prewriting
1. for Strangers

i. Freewriting

ii. List

2. For Family

i. Questions/Answers

ii. Freewrite

3. The whole thing feels a bit disjointed to me so far…

So. Look at the two options you’ve been developing for strangers and family and

Ask:

• Which will allow you to take the greatest risks?
• Which will allow you to make full use of your vocabulary, especially good verbs?
• Which will sound the most like you?

Ok. Got one?

Now, Ask: (from chapter two RW)

Does it interest me?

Can I say something about it?

Is it specific?

Still ok?

To consider: Good stories (from chapter 8 RW)

Reveal something of importance to you.

Include all the major events of the story.

Bring the story to life with details about the major events.

Presents the events in a clear order, usually according to when they happened.

Let’s work on these one by one.

Reveals something of importance to you? Check.

Includes all the major events of the story.

Work on a list of events in your story

Can you narrow it down to three or four major events?

Brings the story to life with details about the major events.

Five senses for each major event

Presents the events in a clear order

Try this form for a simple look at it, or this one for a bit more complexity and some help with intro and conclusion. (.pdf slow to open, but some good stuff here)

Start thinking:

What is the main idea/moral?

What is the conflict?

What is the climax?

What is the resolution?

HOMEWORK: RW Chapter 31 Word Choice

Read 471-477

Do Practice 1, 2, 3

Due Monday

1. Due dates:
1. Prewriting for Strangers/Family Essay due end of the period Friday 10.20
2. Outline of essay due end of period Tuesday 10.24
3. Draft one due at the beginning of the period (BOP) Wed 10. 25
4. Peer Edit credit for students participating Wed/Thurs
5. Draft 2 due BOP, Monday 10.30

Lesson Plan Day 21, Thursday

Family Photo

Show your five answers to the person who asked them.

That person writes two more questions, BASED ON THE ANSWERS.

Answer those questions.

Discussion

Strangers Examples

Coincidence or Fate

Old Fart

Mr. Bill

Family Examples

Photograph of my father in his 22^nd year.

Three Photos

Student Examples

Unconditional Love

The Story Behind the Photo

1. Review types of prewriting (due Friday)
1. Freewrite
2. List
3. Research/read
4. Discussion
5. Cluster/map
6. Questions

· Strangers

1. List

2. Freewrite (not enough)

3. Discussion

4. Reading (plenty after today)

· Family Photograph

1. Questions

2. Read (again, plenty after today)

3. Discussion

a. Tomorrow, Freewriting on family photo

The challenges of the family photograph

You’re too close to it to see it.

Organization? Do you describe the photo? Do you describe specific events?

The whole thing feels a bit disjointed to me so far…

So. Look at the two options you’ve been developing for strangers and family and ask:

• Which will allow you to take the greatest risks?
• Which will allow you to make full use of your vocabulary, especially good verbs?
• Which will sound the most like you?

2. Due dates:
1. Prewriting for Strangers/Family Essay due end of the period Next Friday 10.20
2. Outline of essay due end of period Tuesday 10.24
3. Draft one due at the beginning of the period (BOP) Wed 10. 25
4. Peer Edit credit for students participating Wed/Thurs
5. Draft 2 due BOP, Monday 10.30

Handing Back Essays

Handing Back Essays

A. In same groups you were in to peer edit:
10 minutes to read your essay

• Read the whole thing


• Stop where I’ve written something and read that, too.


• Read the notes at the end


• Show them to your group: discuss and ask each other questions about my comments.


• Look over YOUR self-grading.


• How close were you? This is important for the “real” world writing you’ll do.

Grades: To pass from 70 to 75, you must average 4.0 out of 6.0 to move on. (also 70% on homework).

6-5= A to B+
4-3= B to C
2-1= C- to D

If you received a 4 or above, you’re on track for 75. If you earned a 3.75 or below, you’ve got to catch up on the next three essays.

• Two types of comments- as I read (local) and as I look over it again for score (global).

My impressions from a distance are:

• Not bad on thesis. Could be more “insightful”


• Some didn’t match support, so change support or change thesis?


• Not many make the reader want to learn more, keep reading.


• Support


• tended to more general. Could be more specific. (This will continue to affect scores in Word Choice, too.) Paint the picture.


• Also, keep the thesis in front of reader. Explain, even when it’s obvious, how your support connects to the thesis.


• Organization


• Hooks ok. Too many began with questions.


• Conclusions mostly cookie cutter, which is ok, too, for now.


• Sequence is good.


• Transitions are coming along well.


• Pacing ok.


• Misc


• Grammar an issue in some esp. R/O and V/T.


• Paragraphing (topic sentences, one main idea/event) needs work.

• Yancey Yore/William Peckman


• The 24 hour rule


• SAVE EVERTHING


• IT’S NOT WHERE YOU START, IT’S WHERE YOU FINISH!


• You will have a chance at the end of the quarter to improve your score for one of your essays by revising based on my comments and based on what you’ve learned.

Your options if you don’t like your grade:

• Work Harder.


• Change your habits/attitudes.


• Real Writing review.


• Read more closely.


• More drafts .


• Writing Center.


• See Me.

English 70 Lesson Plan Day 20 Tuesday

English 70 Lesson Plan Day 20, Tuesday

• Hand back essays and explain.


• Stranger prewriting, finish


• Five questions or five senses.

• Exchange your picture with someone else.


• Write five questions for the picture and give it back


• HW: Answer the five questions.


• So far:


• List of strangers


• Freewrite on strangers


• Five questions/senses on strangers


• Five questions answered for photograph

English 70 Lesson Plan Day 19 Monday

1. Journal: Which story did you like better, Mom or Giving Normal?

2. Quiz on Strangers/Mom and Giving Normal

3. Correct Quiz

4. Mr. Bill (stranger-word choice/voice example)

5. The best stranger stories will be ones where the main idea is clear AND interesting.

6. The best stranger stories will be ones that take risks.

7. The best stranger stories will be the ones you can really show off your unique voice/style.

8. Prewriting for second essay

a. Five Questions, Stranger

6. For tomorrow

a. Bring two-three photos of your family that might make good stories. Avoid Sears. Avoid stretching the definition to fit your tastes—family means family. Step, half, distant relatives all count, but your best friend doesn’t. Some one “like” family doesn’t work for this assignment.

7. All essays back tomorrow with extensive notes on how to read my comments and what to do about them.

Raymond Carver -

Photograph of My Father in His Twenty-Second Year

October. Here in this dank, unfamiliar kitchen
I study my father's embarrassed young man's face.
Sheepish grin, he holds in one hand a string
of spiny yellow perch, in the other
a bottle of Carlsbad Beer.

In jeans and denim shirt, he leans
against the front fender of a 1934 Ford.
He would like to pose bluff and hearty for his posterity,
Wear his old hat cocked over his ear.
All his life my father wanted to be bold.

But the eyes give him away, and the hands
that limply offer the string of dead perch
and the bottle of beer. Father, I love you,
yet how can I say thank you, I who can't hold my liquor either,
and don't even know the places to fish?

Three Photographs
by Kate Hoffower

I have a photograph of my sister that I took when she was in college. We are in a cemetery in Massachusetts where Ben Franklin and Mother Goose are buried. She is doing a crayon rubbing on a gravestone that is scratched and cracked with deep shadows and no grass or flowers in front, only dirt. My sister's blonde bangs sweep past her careful eyes, and her left hand is pale contrast, gripping the top edge of the dark stone to steady her paper. If you look closely you can see each bone in her pinky and a softness of her nineteen year old chin that will fade too much in the following months.

But on this day we are drunk with the happiness of a trip alone without parents. Pretending to be adults. Both in college. I have just seen my first opera. I am silly with freedom and an infinite world of new experience. We both know, but do not yet believe, that we will ever die.

I have another photograph of my sister, but this one lives in my memory alone. It is one year later and she is standing in a Chicago movie theatre. In the lobby. In late December. Our mother is lying on the floor. Two strangers are pushing on her chest and breathing into her mouth. Later at the hospital the breather tells us he was once a scuba diver. It is one of those odd details that stick in your head after a hole has ripped open and shown you something you were never meant to see.

In this photograph my sister's face is soft again, but now with the courage of having battled personal demons and won. It is the softness of a strong woman. I have turned to her so that I will not see the paramedics opening my mother's shirt. I have turned to her so that I will not be aware of the people eating popcorn as they glance at my mother's bra. I have turned to her so that I will not hear the desperate hollow sounds coming from my mother's body, or see the clouds that have filled her eyes.

There is a third picture of my sister that I keep in my imagination. She is holding a baby that has fragile pinkies and blonde hair. I wonder at the slightly strange way she supports the baby, tightly against her chest. Until I think about walking my dog earlier, and how I felt a sudden need to carry her for a block, supporting her weight completely in my arms. So that I could feel her heart beating strongly, against my own.

English 70 Lesson Plan Day 19

1. Favorite “Stranger” story
a. Quick summary and vote

b. Look for word choice
i. Verbs, modifiers, memorable phrases

c. Look for voice
i. Which writer would you like to meet?
ii. Which writer takes the biggest risk?
iii. Which writer has the most style?

2. Review types of prewriting

a. Freewrite
b. List
c. Research/read
d. Discussion
e. Cluster/map
f. Questions

3. Strangers

a. “Mr. Bill”
b. Kristen Becker
c. Mrs. Swift
d. Guy out front of theatre
e. Bill at work
f. Swil Kanim
g. The Sweeper
h. Woman in class at Montana
i. Jim Harrick
j. Ace and Rory
k. The Saint
l. Woman on train from Kerry to Dublin
m. Woman in maternity ward

4. Pick one and free write about it for ten minutes.

5. Pick another and ask five questions. (ten minutes here, too)

6. Discussion

7. Family Photo Option

a. Mr. Bill
b. Ella and I on hike
c. Ella at Birth

8. Bring two-three family photos for Monday

9. Due dates:
a. Quiz on Strangers, Mom and Giving Normal the Finger, Monday
b. Prewriting for Strangers/Family Essay due end of the period Friday
c. Outline of essay due end of period Tuesday
d. Draft one due at the beginning of the period (BOP) Wed
e. Peer Edit credit for students participating Wed/Thurs
f. Draft 2 due BOP, Monday 10.30, bring two copies

English 70 Lesson Plan Day 17

1. Journal: What stories do you remember from yesterday?

2. Word Choice and Voice H/O and explain

3. Pick 2 of your favorite stories from ITMFWG “Strangers”

a. Look for word choice—lively verbs, specific modifiers/adverbs/adjectives

b. Which writer would you like to meet?

c. Which writer takes the biggest risk?

d. Which writer has the most style?

4. Review types of prewriting

a. Freewrite

b. List

c. Research/read

d. Discussion

e. Cluster/map

f. Questions

5. List/Brainstorm Strangers

a. Pick one and do the five questions for them.

6. Homework:

a. Read “Giving Normal the Finger” from packet

b. Bring two/three photos of family that might have interesting stories attached to them.

c. If they are at home and you are not, send for them via email if possible. If not, use your mind to remember them.

7. Due dates:

a. Quiz on Strangers, Mom and Giving Normal the Finger, Monday

b. Prewriting for Strangers/Family Essay due end of the period Next Friday 10.20

c. Outline of essay due end of period Tuesday 10.24

d. Draft one due at the beginning of the period (BOP) Wed 10. 25

e. Peer Edit credit for students participating Wed/Thurs

f. Draft 2 due BOP, Monday 10.30

English 70 Lesson Plan Day 17, Wednesday

1. Journal: What specifics do you remember from yesterday?
2. Hand back homework
3. Continue OR of our first essays.
4. Introduce Essay Two
1. Topic
2. Grading
3. Schedule?

i. Quiz on Strangers, Mom and Giving Normal the Finger, Monday 10/16

ii. Prewriting for Strangers/Family Essay due end of the period Friday 10/20

iii. Outline of essay due end of period Tuesday 10/24

iv. Draft one due at the beginning of the period (BOP) Wed 10/26

v. Peer Edit credit for students participating Wed/Thurs 10/27

vi. Draft 2 due BOP, Monday 10.30

5. For homework: Read ITMFWG 173-203

Lesson Plan Day 16 Tuesday

1. Hand In Final Draft of Essay One
2. O/R Yes/No?
3. Yes= +.5
4. No= -.5
5. Essays returned within one week and one day.
6. Homework: Read 153-172 ITMFWG “Strangers”

English 70 Lesson Plan Day 15 Monday

1. Essays due BOP tomorrow
1. No late papers accepted.
2. Beginning of period is beginning of period
3. How you’ll be graded

i. Ideas and Content

1. Clear and focused

2. Fresh and original

3. Holds attention

4. Relevant anecdotes and details

ii. Organization

1. Enhances or shows off main idea

2. Moves the reader through the text

3. Intro and conclusion

4. Pacing

5. Transitions

6. Flow

7. Title

2. Peer Review Review Hand in
3. Homework Ex 5, 6 and 9 in Chapter 6. For practice 6, use ITMFWG’s stories.
4. First things last: Good Intros and Conclusions.

Introductions

Hook the reader

Provide background/context/definitions

State topic and main idea about the topic

Open with a question: (easy)

What’s the easiest way to start an essay? Good question.

Why do people not pick up after their pets? It’s a question I hadn’t thought much about until one day in the park.

Broad to narrow: (Inverted pyramid)

According to anthropologists, pets have been around for at least ten thousand years. In recent times, the last 200 years, our pets have become more and more like family as they moved from the barnyard to the the living room. In our house, the pets aren’t just like family, they run things, especially my pet python who gets her way no matter what we say.

Relevance (Prof. Bevis and Newspapers)

My dog, Stinky, taught me an important lesson about my love life and he might have an answer for you, too.

Open with a short story that relates to your theme (anecdote)

I was walking back from the bathroom when I saw it happen. A sparrow came in for a landing just above my classroom, as they often did. They were known to have nests in the eaves of the buildings. Just as this one landed, however, from nowhere, a hawk landed right on top of the landing sparrow. The hawk grabbed the sparrow and took off.

It was over in the blink of an eye. Nature seemed to be telling me something. In order to survive, we must be on guard at all times. It’s eat or be eaten in today’s global economy.

Open with a quote: (google?)

The greek philosopher Aristotle once said, “Learning begins with questions.”

My grandma always used to say, “If you’re going to live under my roof, you’ll have to live under my rules.”

Open with a surprising fact/statistic: (google?)

Your pet might be saving your life. A recent study from the University of London claims owning a pet can increase your life span by as much as 10 years.

Open with a metaphor (tricky, but big payoff)

A valued object is a savings account for memories. What comes out is what you put in, plus a little more, call it interest, over time.

Conclusions

v Refer back to main point

v Sum up what has been covered

v Make a further observation or point.

v Creates a sense of completion.

o Bring it full circle, answer the question, finish the story